Paul: #WeComeInBoredom

This movie is marketed as an alien comedy, an ambitious idea with the only others in the category being Coneheads and possibly Space Balls. I don’t include Mars Attacks or Men In Black, as those have so much more to offer than comedy like action, creativity and overall quality. I get it, we haven’t had a comedy about alien(s) is quite awhile and the 80s and early 90s were littered with them, but plainly put, this movie sucked. I do generally like the two British guys, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, especially Shawn of the Dead, but this was a huge flop.

The best example of why this movie was so bad is the 2nd scene when the two main characters Graeme and Clive are out in the Area 51 area at a diner. After buying a sticker titled “Alien on Board”, being the big nerdy, alien believers they are, they slap it on the back of their RV. Two minutes later they make contact with Paul, the alien, and then freak out and rip the sticker off the RV. At least 10 minutes introducing the stupid sticker and then just rip it off for some quick laugh, which caused no LOLz for me.

The acting was terrible, the action scenes stupid, including unnecessarily blowing up a house in the middle of nowhere, and the writing was even worse. Of all the alien movies I’ve watched this is definitely in the crap pile. This alien definitely came in boredom.

Cowboys & Motherfucking Aliens: #DecentContact

What’s to say about an alien movie that blends Cowboys and Aliens, and I don’t just mean the title. What do you expect? Shoot em ups, old corale style? Check. Surprising amazing sounds effects? Check. But what about the simple amazing ability of Hollywood’s top people to recruit amazing talent like Daniel Craig and (out of retirement) Harrison Ford? Check.


I’m not going to lie. When I saw the first ad for Cowboy & Aliens during the Super Bowl I jumped out of my seat with excitement. Obviously I’m a huge fan of any movie related to aliens, but throw in cowboys and a ridiculous cast, FUCK YES. 


So, onto the movie. Let’s be clear about one thing. When you set your expectations to the above criteria, this movie dominates. I don’t just mean it’s entertaining. It makes you so giddy to the point where you’re clapping your hands in sarcastic exuberance. More than anything this a movie that should entertain and not ask questions. There are no political or human desire motivations and with a movie with this title there shouldn’t be. 


How the hell Jon Favreau convinced this cast to do this movie is beyond me, but he did put together a thoroughly entertaining movie that you can watch on a Friday night after a grueling week of work, or a Saturday afternoon hungover as hell as I’ll probably be tomorrow. 


Overall, I did enjoy it and I hope you do too…giving the title and all. 

Battle Los Angeles: #DecentContact

You have to hand it to Sony for making the movie Battle: LA. With a fairly large budget (estimated at $100MM) they have already grossed over $200MM and it hasn’t even been released on blue-ray yet. Between a great marketing campaign involving the cool re-entry circles seen above that have become almost iconic, and big names like Aaron Eckhart (so hot right now) and Michelle Rodriguez, who is now the default Hollywood actress for a women in a military role, the studio did it’s job creating a product that sells. 

The movie starts off well and maintains a high energy throughout the first hour. It’s truly entertaining and for an alien invasion movie, it does all the right things. Signs of something approaching the world, general disbelief that anything could go wrong, and then complete domination. I’ve dragged my wife into a lot of these movies and she would like to see aliens that don’t move around like us. The whole two legs, two arms thing is a bit old no?

The military story lines are all too predictable: one guy on his last day before retirement, one guy about to get married and one guy with a baby on the way. Sigh. If I have to fault the movie it’s the last 30 minutes. Really wanes a bit and doesn’t quite have that feel good ending that Independence Day had. Remember that first time you had a GIANT banana split? You’re about 8 years old and you order the jumbo version because why not? You bite into it and think it’s incredible. Best dessert you’ve ever had. Then you get half way through, you’ve eaten a pint of ice cream, a cup of whipped cream and a whole banana…and you’re only half way there. By the time you’re done you think the whole thing was good of course, but you don’t exactly want another one. 

Overall, this movie entertains to the max, especially the first hour. Have a few cocktails, sit back and enjoy a great action packed alien movie. As I always say, Explosions and Aliens. What else do you need?

Skyline: #TakeMeToYourDealer

Skyline was the first alien movie i’ve seen in years that was so horrible that i enjoyed it. The acticting was sub-par (that guy from Dexter got a movie role?!) and the directing wasn’t great either but take it for what it is: two high end special graphics engineers convinced a studio to give them $10,000,000 to create an effects based movie. The fact that the main character you’re relating to the most is killed in the first 30 minutes says something.

Overall, yes it was horrible, and yes it was a bad script with unexperienced actors and unknown directors, but for someone who loves alien movies, i enjoyed it! The ending was so off from the rest of the movie that i must assume this sequel is actually going to happen. 

NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY